Sometimes inspiration and divine guidance show up in our lives as if out of nowhere… unexpected footholds, hidden doorways, unfurling buds of awesomeness blooming at the perfect time. It’s all quite magical really. And while these types of occurrences have more than likely been surrounding me my whole life, I was completely oblivious of the intricate interconnectedness of it all until just the past few years.
In 2011, my husband and I were introduced to a powerhouse lifecoach it seems out of thin air, although I now know that it was the working of a beautiful and synchronistic universe rather than just luck or chance. It wasn’t just her, but also our willingness to ask for help and actually listen to what she had to say and take action, that resulted in some pretty huge life and attitude changes. Since then I’ve become more aware of when magical and synchronistic things happen… instrumental books coming across my desk, friends popping into my life, and inspiring songs jumping across the airwaves and soaking into my big thick skull just when I needed to hear them.
Being aware of my life’s seemingly effortless unfolding is something that I try to tune myself into. I admit that I often find myself more preoccupied with the annoyances, the fears, and the big fat failures more than the magic but I’m working on it. And I’m getting better at remembering to come back to a place of awe and gratitude for the magnificence that is…
Ok, so here’s a case in point of a small yet magical and life-altering situation that catapulted my life to a whole new level…it’s involves a friend, a book and a few innate yet undetermined desires.
Recently my new acquaintance turned friend and Reiki practitioner, Ashley, appeared in my life in a whirlwind of positive energy. She proceeded to give me and my husband a copy of The Desire Map by Danielle Laporte and it is simply AHHHH-MAZING.
Being a Marie Forleo nut and B-School graduate (which is why this website is so utterly awesome by the way) I’d heard of Danielle Laporte through the grapevine. But since my bed-side pile of spiritual discovery and personal development books (yep, just call me a hippy) seems to keep getting bigger and bigger, I hadn’t yet gotten to even purchasing The Desire Map. However once it was magically plopped into my lap I devoured it.
As a lifelong list-maker and goal-setter, it aligned with me immediately. I’ve been writing to-do lists and scrawling intentions all over my mirror for years now.
My notes to myself can range from anything to rah-rah pump myself up mumbo jumbo, i.e – you are beautiful, capable, interesting, accomplished, successful, anybody who doesn’t want to be your friend has to be delusional, etc, etc…
to action items that I crave nothing more than to cross out with accomplished gusto, i.e.- become a Genesis Pure Silver Director by the end of the year…heck yeah!!
I’ve noticed, however, that eventually these notes start to fade from my mirror after about a week’s worth of showers and tooth paste splash back. Not only that but my brain and my eyes soon started conveniently overlooking these bright red scrawling words written with such conviction until they were nothing more than just an annoyance and one more thing that is making me feel bad about myself.
I always start out very eager to daily work toward and achieve these goals but if I don’t end up seeing, or better yet feeling that I was making any headway this eagerness soon backfires and ends up sucking my energy and confidence.
This is exactly what Laporte speaks of in The Desire Map.
“Instead of talking about external goals, let’s talk about how we want to feel in the various parts of our lives.”
Amen to that, sister!
As opposed to goal setting, desire mapping feels more like an invitation to feel the way you want to feel rather than just having another list of things to do. It makes goal-setting fun and creative, transformational and achievable.
“What can we do to feel the way we want to feel? In that simple question lays a new way of living life, which subtly and slowly leads to profound changes in the way we go about getting things done. I officially gave up goal-setting systems, which eventually led to quitting to-do lists, which led to giving up the time-management systems that were totally stressing me out.”
The Desire Map is divided into two sections, the book and the workbook. The book describes in a light and conversational tone, as if you’re talking with your best friend over a margarita swirl, the concepts of desires, feelings, intentions and goals and how all of these things work together to create your ultimate existence. All the while, the underlying message is that ‘feeling good is always our ultimate goal’….who can’t go along with that?
The second section is the workbook. I admit, it took me a while to get through the workbook. It delves deep into the soul which can sometimes be uncomfortable, but hey, when it comes to life, no pain no gain, right? Throughout the workbook you uncover your core desired feelings. It’s tuning into these feelings that help us map out and create the life we truly desire.
At this juncture, Laporte offers a well-deserved intermission so that you can stew upon these newly realized desires and discoveries. It’s heavy and the break is much appreciated.
But don’t go anywhere, it’s now time to get back at it and figure out how to use your core desired feelings to guide what you want to do, what you want to have and what you want to experience. And this is the good stuff. This part is about making connections between how you want to feel and what will actually help you feel that way.
What do I need to do to feel the way that I want to feel?
This part brings you back within yourself once again, which can be a scary place if you haven’t visited there for a while or ever, but required if you plan on living from a place of true authenticity and contentment. The final section is finally where the rubber meets the road and she delves into when desires meet action. Based off of your core desired feelings, Laporte encourages you to choose three or four major intentions and goals for the year. What are three or four of the most potent feel-good opportunities that you would like to actualize this year? The first part is figuring out, the hard part is working at it every day.
Honestly, The Desire Map has changed how I look at myself, my goals, and my everyday life. It’s helped me to concentrate more on what really matters – how I feel, rather than what items I’m knocking off my list or feeling bad about which ones I’m not.
If you’d like to discover The Desire Map for yourself or perhaps learn more about Danielle or check her array of beautifully created, discovery-filled and intense works such as The Desire Map audio book, workbook, or guide to creating goals mp3’s click here. I can’t recommend this book or Danielle Laporte’s writing and encouragement enough.
“Knowing how you actually want to FEEL is the most important form of clarity that you can have. Generating these feelings is the most powerfully creative thing you can do with your life.”
So what do you think would be your core desired feelings?